So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
