I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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