Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
