Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
