I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
