you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
