oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
