I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
