omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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