Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
