every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
