school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
