By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
