So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
3 2 1 whiskey
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?