Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
