I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worst night to have a conscience
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
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