she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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