also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I think my moral compass just broke
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