with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
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