Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
