Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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