Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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