I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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