I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
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