His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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