Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
