Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
only you would photoshop your dick
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize