So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
