It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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