Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
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