they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
