Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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