the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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