Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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