I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
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Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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