Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
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Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
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Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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