You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
