she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I don't want my vagina anymore.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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