So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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