I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize