there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
