worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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