Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I could fuck to npr.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
