I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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