Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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