it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
