Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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