I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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