I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
