Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
